Tiger the Cheetah: What Ever Happened to Real Role Models?

So who hasn’t seen or heard the story of Tiger Woods and his so-called “transgressions” with a number of women (and that number seems to grow daily). Or, waited in the grocery store checkout and flipped through People magazine’s coverage of Jon and Kate Gosselin’s nasty divorce.

Take Britney Spears, for example. She has a divorce, loses her kids, has a public mental breakdown, shows off her hoo-ha in public numerous times, etc.  By my standards, that makes her a total failure. But controversy drove her ‘brand’ through the roof and people made millions from the controversy. The celebrity world can’t survive without controversy and drama.

It’s All About the Controversy

The media creates its own controversy. A guy like Tiger Woods doesn’t even need to commit adultery or drive drunk -the media will decide how they want to label his actions and THAT will become the reality perceived by the public.
Many people have no standard moral compass, so the very nature of the fame that superstars receive is through worship and idolatry, not always through external competence. Fans never hold their superstars to the same standards of their own lives. What superstars get away with on a daily basis,  the average person would probably go to jail for. As a parent, this double standard makes me nuts. Pediatrician and blogger Dr. Gwenn agrees as she writes in her post about out of control celebrity behavior.

One of my two daughters absolutely loves the TLC program, “Jon and Kate Plus 8.” She has recorded and watched every episode of the now cancelled series. She has seen two people go from what she perceived as a loving relationship to one that’s wrought with finger-pointing, money battles and infidelity splashed on the front of every tabloid and as the lead story on prime time entertainment shows. What’s the message here? Treat each other really bad, fight over money and kids and then you’ll be glorified for it by the media. What’s the lesson? Being famous isn’t glamorous, and being parents is hard work that requires mutual respect and commitment from the both.

The Celebrity Double Standard

Now Tiger Woods, clean cut, wholesome, family guy with a wife, kids, dogs - the iconic face of the Nike brand – is now portraying his infidelity as a simple problem. One that can easily be fixed by throwing some money at it. Come on, Tiger, really. Did you seriously think that paying these women off would make your troubles go away? Do you really want to send a message to your adoring fans, many of whom are kids, that it’s ok to offer to pay your wife millions to stay married when you’ve been fooling around with women across the country? And this is headline news on the major television networks. Give me a break.

Gatorade announced today that it was discontinuing its “Gatorade Tiger Focus” sports drink. Smart decision, Gatorade. Their move isn’t much different than Nutella foregoing a relationship with Kobe Bryant after his sexual assault charge and Kellogg’s dropping Michael Phelps after  his bong incident.

The constant media focus on celebrities and their outrageous behavior, combined with attention-seeking reality TV star-wannabes, like the White House state dinner crashers, is creating a generation of kids who have no real role models.  As long as we parents continue to buy these magazines, watch these shows and buy the products endorsed by celebrities whose behavior is hardly role model material, the cycle will continue.

Let’s Focus on REAL Role Models

The people who deserve our attention are the people, the real role models, who make this country great. It’s really not hard to find them – but they’re out there. The media, though, seems to have difficulty locating them. They are soldier and their families who stay behind while they fight in Iraq. They’re the volunteers who feed, clothe and house the homeless. They are firefighters and police officers who work 24/7 to keep us safe. Public health workers fighting H1N1 and medical researcers. They are athletes like former Ohio State Buckeye and Heisman Trophy winner, Eddie George. Eddie created the EGX Kids Fitness Challenge to bring awareness to and help reverse the rising rates of childhood obesity through physical activity, nutrition, and overall healthy lifestyle changes.

Let’s start rewarding and recognizing good behavior so we give our kids they best chance to grow up smart and confident with a good moral compass, a sense of what’s right and wrong and an understanding of what integrity is. And sorry, Tiger, since morphed into a cheetah with few morals and no apparent since of right and wrong, you no longer have my support.

Should The Guidelines Be Sidelined?

Many people in Columbus, Ohio are mourning today, saddened over the loss of Stefanie Spielman, wife of former OSU great and Buffalo Bills player, Chris Spielman. Only 42, she passed away at home surrounded by her family, including her four children. The Spielmans together helped raise millions for cancer research at The Ohio State University Medical Center’s James Cancer Hospital.

Just a couple weeks ago, I lost another friend, Jill Steuer, 57, to breast cancer, too. Jill was a nurse whose expertise in cardiac care was unsurpassed, and she made many significant contributions to improving patient care in central Ohio.

Another friend died in 2004, leaving behind four children and a husband, and several friends are currently dealing well with the disease since they caught it early.

This really makes me ask the question – what’s the deal with the new guidelines on breast cancer screening from the U.S. Preventive Services Task Force? After hearing for years that you should get an initial mammogram at age 40 and every year thereafter, this is fairly confusing. I thought this four-minute segment did a pretty good job explaining the issues at hand.

Great, but the American Cancer Society (ACS) and the American College of Obstetrics and Gynecology (ACOG) disagree with these new guidelines. It makes me wonder how much these women’s lives would have been different had these new guidelines been in place 10 or 20 years ago.

Then on top of this, ACOG issues new cervical cancer screening guidelines. These, however, aren’t much different than the ACS recommendations. Thank goodness.

It’s almost like each of us needs a Blackberry just to manage the complexity of scheduling the right appointments in the right location at the right time with the right doctor. Crazy.

You have to wonder, too, how healthcare reform will impact our choices, our insurance coverage, our ability to choose physicians, hospitals and other aspects of our care.

In the meantime, I’m deferring to my doctor, not a government panel, to help determine what’s for me given my family history and his knowledge of overall health. And trust me, I’m keeping the mammogram (see my post Newblets and the Boob X-Ray) yearly and other preventive checkups on the Blackberry for now and the foreseeable future.

Crucial Conversations

The other day I met a great physician who, ironically, is also a pastor. Maybe it’s not so ironic considering they are both professions that you help people feel better – emotionally, physically and spiritually.

Dr. Jeff Gordon is a hospitalist at Grant Medical Center in Columbus, Ohio. Grant is an urban Level I trauma center and surgical hospital and treats thousands of patients annually – from the affluent to the homeless. Each person, however, has one thing is common. They all want to get better and go home. Sometimes, however, they can’t leave. Modern medicine hasn’t worked or their bodies have been ravaged by an illness or disease, resulting in their condition worsening.

Dr. Gordon and I met by chance, though we both have connections to the same hospital. Recently he wrote a wonderful book that emphasizes the importance of talking to your family about end-of-life decisions. You’re probably thinking that’s the last thing you want to talk about with your family members when life is good. But you never know when your health can change – it can be overnight, or when you’re well into your senior years.

Having spent years taking care of patients and their families, Dr. Gordon has seen firsthand the difficulties families face when their loved one is in the hospital and the chances for recovery look less than optimistic. This is especially true for people whose parents are elderly.

The cool thing about Dr. Gordon’s book, A Death Prolonged, is that it’s fiction. It’s really a quick read that addresses the moral and ethical dilemmas that families and medical professionals face with respect to end-of-life care. The story centers around resident Dr. Kate Simon and the challenges that she, her colleagues and families of patients struggle with when they realize that the patient’s quality of life is significantly compromised and they’re faced with tough decisions about next steps. Not being a medical professional, I found it interesting and informative because it’s not full of difficult to understand clinical terminology.

We likely all have heard about living wills, durable power of attorney for healthcare and do not resuscitate orders, but this book explains these in documents detail in a practical and understandable way, even for a lay person.

A couple weeks ago, PBS’s Religion and Ethics NewsWeekly filmed a story at Grant about end-of-life issues.  Two patients had end-of-life discussions with Dr. Gordon, and they also interviewed Dr. Phil Hawley, director of the hospital’s ICU.

One of the people being featured in the program is my friend, Jill, a nurse, who is dealing with her second round of breast cancer, and unfortunately, chemotherapy is no longer working. Jill and her wonderful partner, Joan, were filmed as part of this program that we hope will show the importance of a strong support system for people facing terminal illnesses.  Jill is currently receiving hospice care and is open to talking to her friends about her wishes.

In Columbus, the program will air on Sunday, October 11th at 11:00am on WOSU-TV, Channel 34. The piece can also be seen online at www.pbs.org/religion when it is posted on Friday, Octobero 9 at around 6 p.m. The site has a channel finder feature. Here’s a preview.

It’s been interesting to talk to Dr. Gordon, then hear firsthand from friends and co-workers who are dealing with these issues with elderly family members. It makes you realize just how important it is to have these conversations with your parents and other family members when they are healthy – without the incredible stress and pressure that comes from having to make a decision when you’re not prepared for it. It’s really not a morbid discussion, but rather one that enables you to respect the wishes of that person and show your care and concern for them up to their last moments on earth.

 

The Prostrate Exam

Back in the early 90s, I worked in a hospital marketing/communications department with a staff of four. Not a big group, but a good team of people. Because we were small, we wore many hats including that of receptionist when needed

One year, our hospital offered free prostate cancer screenings for men over age 50. We promoted the screenings in a number of different ways as you’d expect – newspaper, direct mail, flyers, the usual. This was before people could go online and register, so they had to call to make an appoint.

One Text Too Many

There’s a new video out that every teenager should watch. Maybe more than just teenagers – anyone with a cell phone, Blackberry or other pocket-size communications device.

A video made by the police department in Gwent, Wales uses a graphic car accident re-enactment to highlight to the potentially tragic consequences of texting while driving.

Shock and Awe

The public service announcement, made last summer for $20,000, was posted on YouTube and has been seen by more than a million people. The quality of the video production is extraordinarily real and can certainly shock you into putting down your mobile devices.

Size Matters

I caught a glimpse of The Today Show when getting ready for work this morning. The teaser the lead me to watch a particular segment about “a plus-size model baring it all.”

Model Lizzi Miller was featured talking about her recent photo in the September issue of Glamour magazine.  Miller, who is considered “plus size” because she wears a size 12 or 14, is featured in a story the magazine did about being comfortable in your own skin.

Tanorexics, Get Out of Bed!

Back to school shopping. It’s a rite of passage for many families every August. I always find it difficult to shop for school clothes when it’s 90 degrees out and the stores are full of jeans, flannel and boots. I just love it when my girls want to buy overpriced, often poorly made clothes that my they will grow out of before winter or that will grow out of fashion in just a few months.

Kotex and the Swiffer Wet-Jet

Having worked in healthcare marketing and communications for my entire career, I’m always interested in how companies are marketing to women. Women are important to companies because they often control many purchasing and healthcare decisions.

Today, my friend Katherine brought in a sample that she received in the mail. Cleverly concealed inside a fairly large box were four samples of Kotex pads. Yes, Kotex, the same brand that your grandmother used. The same kind of feminine product that achieved such brand notariety that it became a household name, like Scotch tape, Kleenex and Tampax (what’s the deal with paper product names ending with “x” anyway?).

Teaching Tolerance In An Intolerant World

Both of my daughters have special needs students in their schools. These are typically children with Down Syndrome, cerebral palsy or other sorts of developmental disabilities. My husband and I have been candid with our girls about how these children are different than they are, but they’re still children with real feelings and unique abilities, just like they are.

Emily tells me that most of the kids in her school with special needs are treated pretty well by others. I was glad, especially because children can be pretty mean to one another.

I’m Not Wedded To This Gown

The Butt of Many Jokes

Not so long ago, I visited a friend in the hospital. He had been admitted for a cardiac cath, so I thought I’d stop by and say hi. I went up to his assigned room, peeked through the open doorway and heard water running in the bathroom. Figuring he’d be finished soon, I waited patiently in the doorway. I’m sure he didn’t realize that I was waiting for him because when he left the bathroom, I got the full Monty. Yes, I saw his buns on the run thanks to the lovely crazy hospital gowns with the snaps in the back.