Newblets and the Boob X-ray

Talking about girl stuff

My two daughers are entering the stage of life that we parents eagerly await from the day they’re born. Yes, it’s puberty. The time when little girls become, well, hormonal not-so-little and growing every day girls. It’s the time when our hair starts to grey more quickly.

Not long ago, my youngest daughter, Emily, decided that she was going to come up with a new name for a young girl’s expanding chest. Now, I have to admit, this is a great name (her English skills come from me, not her dad, I’m proud to say).

First of all, we all know the word “boob,” right?  We all have boobs. Well, she decided that a mini boob should be called a “booblet.” Perfect. Kind of like a little pig is called a piglet. But in girls her age, these booblets are new, so she devised the combination of the words “new” and “booblet” into “newblet.” Newblet!  I love this word.  After all, boys use the word “boobs” and boys are so are so, well, weird. And breast, that’s just so doctor-y.
The Newblet Checkup

Last week,  told Emily and her sister, Abby, that I was going to get a newblet checkup, and naturally, they were curious about the procedure. Not only do they have a couple of friends whose moms died from breast cancer, we watch a lot of health programs at home, so they had some idea about mammograms.

So I explained that you have to stand in front of a machine that squishes your newblets.  In my case, however, after two kids, I think it’s more appropriate to call them drooplets.  To spare my girls impressionable young minds, I left out some of the details…especially the part about having someone stretch your newblets out in front of you, then squish them between two copies of War and Peace.

I didn’t really go into detail, either, about the lovely flowered sticky, BB thingies that you have to stick on the end of your newblets (I absolutely hate the “n” word so I am going to call these “ends”) so the mammography tech can get an accurate reading. My friend, Davi, actually contemplated leaving these on her newblets after her mammogram with the thought that her husband would really like the look.

High-Definition Newblets

Gosh, I loved my digital mammogram. Not because of the quarter-inch thick MammoPad (aka boob pillow) provided for my comfort or because the tech made me feel at ease while hoisting my newblet onto the machine boob vice.

Digital image (left) and regular film image (right) - NOTE: These are NOT mine!

It was great because of the ultra-clear HDTV-like image on the screen – perfectly squished with the sticky BB thingy on the end. I can see how these are a huge advantage over regular x-ray films. I was hoping they’d email the image to me to use as my screen saver.

When I came home from work that day, Emily asked me how my boob x-ray was. In all seriousness, I explained that it was a little uncomfortable, but only for about 10 seconds. Both girls thought the worst part was that I ran the risk of smelly pits because I couldn’t wear deodorant until after the procedure.  I loved that they were so inquisitive about the whole process.

They wanted to know the results of the mammogram, and I told them the hospital would let me know once they looked at the digital pictures (which was also pretty cool to them).

Mammograms: Just Say Yes

So my point here is that as a mom, it’s important that we position ourselves as healthcare role models. We need to be open and honest with our kids so that they can always feel comfortable talking to us about their newblets and other body parts. I want my kids to always feel they can bring me any questions or concerns that have.

If it’s been a year or more since your last visit to the doctor, make an appointment. A couple of friends who are courageously beating the disease will agree – they did routine self-exams (which maybe we’ll get to later) and screening mammograpms. One of the best things you can do for your kids is to take care of yourself. And your newblets. They’ll both thank you for it.

If you want to know more information about mammograms, two informative sites are the American Cancer Society Web site or the American College of Radiology site. To schedule your mammogram, ask your doctor for a location or call your local hospital.

PS – got the results in the mail…all is good.

 

 

 

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